Learning to Trust

I was a school teacher in 1987 when I married John. He was a Richmond City police officer. Everyone who knew John acknowledged the fact that he was in the right profession. Police work was in his blood. He loved what he did. He became a Virginia State Trooper in 1988 and I never saw a change in our future. I imagined living life in that one city; stable, secure, certain. Little did I know that God had a different plan when He called John into the ministry just four years after we were married. Since that time, John has worked at a rescue mission, gotten a BS degree in Biblical Studies while he worked full time and finally we went to Romania as missionaries. All the while, I was raising babies, youngsters and then teens. I was learning to be frugal on a slim budget and doing my best to teach them at home. Our life has rarely been stable or certain as I had imagined it would be; chaotic and sporadic are the adjectives that pop into my head. But throughout these many years, God has taught us that He is faithful and true. He is the Rock that we can stand on when the storms of life are raging all around us. He alone is steadfast and unchanging. He alone knows the next step of our journey. I am learning that He knows all about my tomorrows and I am learning to trust Him for each day.

The above paragraph was written on March 16, 2007, the day after we returned from Romania. We had absolutely no clue as to where our life would end up. At that point we never dreamed that God's path would lead us back to Virginia and the State Police. Never did we imagine that after giving up our life in 1992 that God would give it all back. My heart is full and I have many more things to say about this subject. But for now, I just want to say that God is good. All the time. Praise the name of the LORD.

Healing Broken Hearts

I wrote this just over two years ago, days after we returned from Romania.

The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Psalm 34:18

I was nearly 16 when we left my favorite place in the world, San Diego, California, to move to the Podunk town of Hixson, Tennessee. Someone certainly thought of an appropriate name for that place, I thought way back then. The high school years are a horrible time for such drastic changes in a teenager’s life. I had good friends and a good school. I liked my life as it was and I did not want it to change. I certainly did not want to move to a place where everyone spoke with a weird accent and talked about buggies in the grocery store and stove eyes in the kitchen. What were my parents thinking? What was God thinking? But we did move. My parents took me, practically kicking and screaming, across the continent and away from everything that was familiar. Eventually, it became home. I grew accustomed to the accent and even adopted it myself. I learned exactly how to say “ice” and that all carbonated drinks were called “coke”. The kids at school were normal kids, most of them. I really expected red hair and bare feet. I made friends and fell in love with the south. Years later, I realized that leaving California was the best thing for me. God had a plan for my life. He knew the best path.

Fast forward nearly three decades and I find my son in the same situation. We left Romania just days before his 16^th birthday. The culture here in the States is practically foreign to him. He has left his best friend and a life he loved in a country he will probably never live in again. He is broken hearted and must be wondering what God is thinking.

Over the years, I have seen first hand how God has worked in my life. He has led me through difficult times, challenges, failures and tragedies. Time after time He has healed my broken heart and I have become stronger because of the trials. Now my children are growing up. I know that in this life, they will face their own struggles. The sorrow of life cannot always be healed with a mother’s kiss and a band-aid. Children grow up and they must learn to rely on the One who directs their steps, the One who loves them so much more than their mother. It is breaking my heart to see his heart broken. I kneel down and ask God to hold him close, so close that he can feel God’s presence and know that God does indeed have a reason for that path He has asked us to walk. I am trusting Him to heal broken hearts.

He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. Psalm 147:3

The Lord has healed Gabriel's broken heart. From time to time, he still longs for Romania, his friends and the life we lived there. We all do. Gabriel is growing up and learning to trust God to direct his steps. I am excited to see where the Lord is leading him.

My Story - Part 1

This is the beginning of my story of being called to be a missionary and my life in Romania. I posted this on my other blog and thought I would share it here. I will post more later.

Like any story, there is a beginning and this is where I will start. Not the very beginning. That would be Genesis 1:1 and I was not there. Not my beginning either because I do not remember it. Instead, I thought I would share my first thoughts of being interested in serving the Lord.

Most missionaries do not have a blinding light experience like the Apostle Paul calling them into God’s service. God’s voice does not thunder down from heaven telling them exactly the next step to take. My first thought of full time Christian service had a much more humble beginning. It was in the lunchroom of a rural elementary school in the state of Kentucky. I was sitting with my best friend Susan talking about who knows what. Susan and I became best friends from the beginning of that school year and we were inseparable. We shared a birthday and each of us had an older brother named David. Those were important commonalities for ten year olds. I do not recall our conversation that day but the words of the boy across the table were unforgettable. I had a secret crush on him. However, I was much too shy to ever let him know my feelings, even when he was chasing me around the playground. I do not remember the date or the many other details of that day but his words still ring clear in my memory. “God has called me to preach,” he proudly announced. Our response was deplorable. We laughed out loud, hysterically and recklessly. The boy was deeply hurt and the agony was visible on his face. I laughed because Susan laughed. I laughed because it was the only thing I could think to do at that moment. It was then that I knew I would be a preacher’s wife.

Blessings and Thankfulness

In our family, we typically begin each meal by giving thanks and asking God's blessing on the food. Next week I will begin to make serious homeschool plans. Before I find myself buried in the multitude of decisions about curriculum and schedules, I want to give thanks to God for the many blessing in my life and ask Him to bless our homeschool year. I have previously written this list and today I decided to read it once again, rewrite it and tweak it just a bit. Here is my list of things that I am thankful for in no particular order.

1. God's mercy
2. God's grace
3. Salvation freely given
4. Eternal life through Jesus Christ
5. A relationship with Almighty God, Abba Father
6. His love so richly bestowed upon me
7. The privilege to go boldly before His throne of grace
8. His Word
9. Casting my cares upon Him because He cares for me
10. His thoughts toward me that cannot be numbered
11. A husband who loves me
12. Health
13. Air conditioning
14. A kiss from my sweetheart
    
15. An ice cold drink of water
16. My mom
17. My dad
18. Two brothers
19. Being raised in a Christian home
20. Gabriel
21. Hannah
22. Holly
23. Being able to homeschool my children
24. A multitude of resources to accomplish the task
25. My 93 year old grandmother who is still able to welcome us into her home and cook delicious meals for us
26. New mercies each morning
27. A sun-shiny day
28. Seasons
29. A cool day in the summer
30. Wisdom
31. Music
32. The library with books written in English
33. The laughter of my children
34. Ears to hear that joyful sound
35. Eyes to see my family's smiles
36. My youngest child reading aloud to me
37. Singing together
38. Making plans
39. A free country
40. A comfortable bed
41. A soft pillow
42. Wall to wall carpet
43. Swimming
    
44. Dinner with my family
45. Time to myself
46. A chance to blog
47. My computer
48. The internet that helps me feel so much closer to my family and friends who are so very far away
49. My computer desk
50. A day to relax
51. Our church
52. Youth group for the kids
53. A chance to praise
54. A dishwasher to clean the dishes and spare our skin
55. God's provision
56. The many "I love you's" from my husband and kids
57. My children's artwork
58. Memories
59. Encouraging comments
60. Clean clothes
61. A washer to wash them in
    
62. A dryer too
63. A husband who loves the Lord
64. And is zealous about His Word
65. A husband who spends time with his children
66. And talks to them about big and small things
67. Trees to shade us from the harsh summer sun
68. Gentle rain
69. Every breath that I take
70. Every beat of my heart
71. Every moment that God is watching over me and I don't even think about it
72. Brushing my daughter's hair who is only little for a little while longer
73. A God who knows my name
74. My Lord Who knows the path that I take
75. My Redeemer Who lives
76. A car that has A/C
77. Another day with my family
78. Coupons
79. A little girl who loves to cook
80. And play with dolls
81. And give me hugs
82. Two girls who love to sing
83. A teenage girl who loves photography
84. And being with mom
85. And gives me hugs
86. A son who loves drama and politics
87. And is much too quickly growing up
88. And loves the Lord
89. And still gives me hugs
90. A nice big stove to prepare home cooked meals
91. Sweet tea
92. Two girls who know how to make it perfectly
93. Ice
94. Comfortable tennis shoes
95. A good night's sleep
96. Sandals
97. Cookouts
98. All the colors of the rainbow
99. Blue
100. Reading out loud to my children
101. Their attentiveness
102. Their energy
103. Orange juice
104. Milk
105. Cereal, especially the many varieties available here in the USA
106. My family watching a funny movie together
107. A God who calls me by my name
108. A Lord who calls me His
109. The gospel preached to others
110. A chance to serve
111. The promises of God
112. A new career for John
113. Fellowship with friends
114. More than enough food
115. Books
116. Rest
117. Hope
118. A peaceful heart
119. A song in my heart
120. God's Word to light my path, especially when I do not know the way

What's on your list?

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18

A New Beginning

"It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him."

I decided today that it is time to begin again. For far too long, I have been frustrated with my other blog. It has issues that I cannot fix. Those who can fix are either too busy or too expensive. And so I begin again. With this new beginning, I thought I would choose a new title. John and I and our three children have spent ten years as missionaries to Romania. Now we are on a new road. Without God's mercy and compassion I know we would not have made it this far. With this new adventure and one of my many favorite verses, I selected "New Every Morning" as my blog title. I hope you will join me as we travel this road on which our merciful and compassionate God is leading us.